Lately I have been dealing with judging my judging mind.  Can you relate?  I often make this my new year’s resolution or try to give up judging for lent.  But the thoughts in my mind can be relentless, even more concerning to me are some of the judging words that I release to the world.  They instantly feel toxic of just completely unnecessary once they leave my lips. So, I have been reflecting on what types of practices may help me to consider is it wise, is it true, is it necessary before I get stuck in some of my more frequent negative critical thought patterns.   Whether these thoughts stay with me or I release them through unwise speech these patterns are not something I want to keep writing and wiring as my guiding thoughts.

With a bit of reflection on this rainy weekend, I came up with an idea that may be helpful.   Often, we remain mired in our thoughts by staying up in the mind, where let’s be honest it can be hard to stay neutral.  Perhaps a technique that could help is moving awareness from the mind down into the heart.  The Heart Math Institute has been advocating and educating about these types of practices for years.   A simple one is to pause and breath deeply into the heart space and image a genuine feeling of love or gratitude.  Next try to release breath control and stay with just the feeling a moment more, observing the shift in your energy and connection to your spirit.   Doc Childre author of The HeartMath Solution suggests that the message of the heart becomes clearer when the mind is quite:  And in order to truly quiet the mind, we need to bring the head into alignment with the heart.  Feelings suggested to cultivate this sense of alignment and coherence include appreciation, compassion, care, nonjudgement and forgiveness.

I love how wisdom teaching may use different verbiage but in the end the basic truths that lead to wholeness are like different hues on the color palate or different pathways that lead to the same peaceful place. I have aways been enamored with the poetic writing of Mark Nepo and it is probably of no coincidence that I came across his latest article in Spirituality and Health  this weekend.   His writing for me is like another doorway home, this one was entitled Resilience and Prayer, he says this; The deeper reward for inhabiting our full humanity is that the Universal Life-Force floods us with enlivened capacity. Just as you must plug in a lamp to access electricity, our presence and full humanity are required as a way to “plug in” to the Universal Life-Force that flows through all things.  In this article he discusses the importance of speaking from our hearts (rather than from our judging minds!) as well as listening to our hearts.

 If a judging thought arises, the work to be done is to pause and try to move awareness into the heart.  Another technique that has worked for me in the past to quiet my mind is to pause and send the person I am judging a quick shot of meta.   Meta meditation is a mindfulness practice in which we send loving thoughts to oneself, a loved one, a neutral person, a difficult person and all beings.   Just quickly sending the person I am judging (or worried about… another of my afflictions. I own it!)  loving blessings changes the mind and moves one into the heart.  Something as simply as may she (insert your person’s name) be happy, may she be free from suffering, may she be at ease, may she know the joy from knowing her own soul.  Or some other version of blessings, surrounding this person with love and light.  You may also want to include yourself so you can release the guilt or shame of judging or worrying.   

Returning to Mark Nepo’s beautiful sentiments.  When he discusses quieting our hearts, he is implying a prayerful state of being receptive rather than using prayer time to download our lists of requests, this really spoke to me. I try to include this type of prayer time in my daily life but honestly couldn’t we all be more purposeful about creating this type of time for ourselves and to connect to our own hearts?   Mark says this:  But the deeper sense of prayer has always been to still ourselves enough to listen and receive, to ask for nothing. When we can empty ourselves of schemes and demands, when we can let the fear settle and open ourselves without intent, this quiet bravery lets us be renewed by the forces of Wholeness.

Renewed by the forces of Wholeness.  This is what all our practices aim to do, be it yoga, meditation, prayer time or the biggest practice of all simple authentic living.   As I reflect on this perhaps my judging mind does come from a place of lack.  This is certainly conditioned by current society and its uncomfortableness with silence and the commonplace activity of projecting our insecurities onto others.  Over and over again and yes with forgiveness for when I do not, I am taking responsibility for my own thoughts and words.  As we all choose to do just this again and again, we could intentionally cultivate a more loving world.  We control our breath and can frequently return to qualities of the heart such as appreciation, gratitude, compassion, nonjudgement and forgiveness. 

When considering these matters of the heart, I also consulted the wisdom of the Bible.  I always find inspiration from Paul, who wrote a good part of the later chapters of the Bible. I love his enthusiastic and purposeful heart.  He says this in the chapter of 2 Corinthians –We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also. – 2 Corinthians 6:11-13.  Widen you heart.  Breath into it.  Allow the higher vibrational feelings to flow freely, flowing both inward and outward.  

Paul also says this in Ephesians.  …that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of Him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which He has called you…” – Ephesians 1:16-18 ESV.  The eyes of our hearts enlightened!  Really reflect on this.  I sense, if we can pause and breath deeply even when we have judging thoughts, we can shift the way we see, polish our lens so to speak and see and act more from a heart that aligns with God, wide open and more holy.